Flashback...

Well, I dont have alot of time, or much to say really, but this picture says enough. This is my sister as David, the shepherd and me a sheep. hahaha. We came up with this idea. it was pretty awesome. Ill have to see if i can find the picture of her as moses and me as the burning bush.. haha that really did happen

Meredith Fox

About a month ago, I was driving home from work when I heard about a wreck that happened a few miles from my office. The wreck involved some high school students from the school I attended. I was sad to hear the news, but was pretty sure I wouldn't know any of the students involved since I graduated over 7 years ago. But when I got home, I decided to look online to see if there was any more information about the accident. I quickly realized that I did know one of the students. She had been a camper at Kanakuk my first year. I remembered Meredith being a cute, happy, 7 year old gymnast. I hadn't seen or talked to her since that summer, but had thought about her some and vaguely remembered her being from Memphis. Well in the past month I have learned more about her and what an amazing 14 year old girl she had grown to become. At her funeral they described her as always smiling, full of life and energy, she loved the Lord and that she really knew how to love people well... I have been challenged in many ways to live my life to the fullest and to love others the way that Christ would want us to.. I will write more about this soon. but here's a link to the memorial video for those of you that knew her or want to know more about her...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVd7mpzxFEY

Audrey's 1st Birthday

Well. This year has officially flown by. Audrey turned 1 today.

We celebrated this past Saturday. Catie (and Jackson) made her a cute dog cake. Audrey was excited to have everyone at her house visiting, she loves people.

I cant believe how grown up she looks.

She loved her cake...

Audrey really enjoyed her new toys. Especially her new found speed when she is walking behind her ride on toys she got. It is fun watching her grow and see her personality develop more and more. She loves dogs, thinks Jackson is hilarious, and smiles almost all the time.

It's Fall!

I'm excited about this Fall, since for the first time since I was an aunt, I get to spend time with my niece and nephew. Last Sunday, I took my Mom, Catie (my sister), Audrey (my niece) and Jackson (my nephew) out to a farm in Rossville called Toms Farm, alot of people from my church were getting together there and I thought that Jackson and Audrey would have fun so we all went.
I have some pictures. Let me start off with my favorite one. This is Jackson making a mean face for the camera so that I could try to trick Him into smiling in the next picture. It didnt work out very well but I thought this picture was funny.

Heres another one of Jackson. He still wouldnt smile, but not too bad of a picture. He was so excited to be there, and this was when we were waiting to go on the hayride.

I thought this one was cute too. He was so little next to the tire.

Heres my favorite picture. I cant believe that everyone is actually looking at the camera.
I love it, and I love my family too, so thankful that we are getting to spend so much time together.

.

pushing the play button....

i quit my job back in may to take a summer internship working for a youth group at a church in oklahoma. i know it seems crazy, with the economy and everything to quit a full time job to accept a summer internship. but thats what i did. and i still can say without a doubt that was the best thing for me to do...
so i worked in oklahoma till july, then moved back to memphis to wait till i heard about some jobs that i applied for. well i was offered one of those jobs pretty soon after i left, but decided that i didnt want that job. typically when interviewing someone, you dont want to tell them that the job they are applying for is a "very stressful job." i decided that i did not want to travel and be stressed alot, so i didnt take the job. since then i have been waiting for "my dream job" that i applied for and actually got an interview. the interview went very well and they told me they would call me a week later. they never did. to make a long story short, they are still having me wait. its been months. now im in the midst of waiting 2 more weeks to see if they are going to fill this job or another job. its not been too bad waiting since ive been working full time at a photography studio i worked at several years ago but its hard to just relax knowing that any day any minitue they could either call and offer me the job or they could say that they decided not to fill the position. so i am really anxious and hoping that they will call sometime soon.
over the past few months i have learned several things about life. one thing that i have learned is that i keep putting my life on hold for other people and things. but now i think its time for me to live for myself and follow after God and noone else. so here i go. there are 2 things that are keeping me from living life to the fullest. and its not that these things are necessarily bad, one is the job i keep waiting on and one is a friendship. so neither is bad really, but the thing that makes them bad is that i keep putting my life on hold for these 2 things. so im moving on from this, not going to let these things put the rest of my life on pause (but i will still be excited if i get the job, but in the meantime im going to be looking to see what i want to do).
i think about the future often and what id like for it to be like. id like to be married and have kids, but i know that is not in my immediate future (even though sometimes i think im ready for that). so if im really going to quit putting my life on pause and start enjoying today what do i want to do? what is it that really uses the gifts that God has blessed me with?
well part of this stems from the 2 years that i worked at the home for girls in foster care in arkansas. when i think about the happiest times, when i felt most in my element, using gifts that God has blessed me with, i think about the times spent with those girls and campers at camp. There are memories that flood my mind every time i think of them. several of those girls are on my mind throughout the day and i would absolutely do anything i could for them... so why am i telling you all this? because thats what gets me excited about life... picture this with me... a small cabin on a few acres of land, my dogs running around the yard, and several girls living life with me, through good times and bad, some from worse backgrounds than you can imagine, some young girls some teenagers... it doesnt matter really, all i want is to have a home where girls feel wanted and loved, and where they can learn about God, and i can patiently love on them through a hard time in their life and for the rest of their lives or for the season that God allows me to be with them. thats what i want...
so will this happen? im not sure.. i could get the job i applied for several months ago. but will my heart change? no... the girls ive met, their stores, their sweet faces, are forever engrained on my mind and in my heart, i will never forget them, and i will always wish that i could have done more for them. i pray that God will lead me, especially over the next few weeks and months, to the right people to help me determine what He has planned for my future, and that He will give me a peace and understanding about His plans.

and so it all begins...

until today. i never thought that i would ever have a blog. but i realized that it would be a good way to stay connected with people that its hard to talk to all the time and just a place to be real. so here it is. my honesty, my life, and a little bit of my humor thrown in for good measure.

ever since i turned 25 this summer, i feel different. almost like i am on a rollercoaster and about to go down a steep hill that ive been climbing up for months. things are about to change drastically and im not even sure what will change. i just know that things will change. the ride will go down and im not sure what to expect... but thats something that ive realized recently, that id rather not know whats going to happen next or later on in the future. because most of the time even if you know something is going to happen you still arent able to prepare for it, so id rather just take life as it comes, one day at a time. im learning so much right now, probably more than ever before. things that you dont learn in school but you have to learn on your own through experience. like how i can be truly happy in life. how to live my life one day at a time. and how to love my family and other people the way that i should.

so im excited. about several things. about change, not just as in the seasons of the year transitioning from summer to fall, but about my life. the changes that will come, both good and bad, because i know that they come hand in hand. and im excited that you are reading my blog, for your friendship and desire to know more about me and my life...